Burris' Shot Tossed Into The 12th Row
Burris and Kramer. Two men burned by their own desire.
An old high school friend (and fellow political junkie) posted on Facebook that he "couldn't believe the Senate really gave Roland Burris the Heisman (stiff arm, not the trophy)."
Senate officials this morning rejected Roland Burris's effort to be seated as the successor to President-elect Barack Obama, telling the former Illinois attorney general that he lacked the requisite approval of state officials to be sworn in with the rest of the class of 2008 in today's launch of the 111th Congress.
...
Senate Majority Leader Harry M. Reid (D-Nev.) and a bipartisan group of leaders have rejected Burris's appointment on the grounds that the criminal charges against Blagojevich, including one that he tried to sell the appointment in exchange for financial gain, make it impossible for him to pick a successor to Obama without tarnishing the decision.
The impression I got was that the party said -- in no uncertain terms -- that all Democrats were to cut the governor loose. We're talking a giant, neon Seinfeld-esque Kenny Rogers Roasters sign screaming STAY AWAY.
Still, Burris wanted the job, so took the shot while it was there... and got completely rejected. Swatted. Roofed. Denied.
That's what happens when you don't work within the team offense -- the boss says you're not professional enough for the big leagues, benches you, and tries to trade you (see Randolph, Anthony).
More Fun With Blagojevich
These are tough times in America, but the corruption scandal that is Rod Blagojevich is the gift that keeps on giving.
Sitting across from C in a cafe today, she started laughing for no reason. I asked her what was so funny, and she said she was reading an article about the embattled governor's nomination of Obama's Senate replacement.
Sure sounds boring, right? Not if you read this as the Blagojevich would have spoken it in private,or as C read it to herself... with f-bombs galore! Try it yourself, it's lots of fun:
GOV. ROD BLAGOJEVICH (ILL.): The people of Illinois are entitled to have two United States senators represent them in Washington, D.C.
As governor, I am required to make this appointment. If I don't make this appointment, then the people of Illinois will be deprived of their appropriate voice and vote in the United States Senate.
Therefore, I am here to announce my intention to appoint an individual who has unquestioned integrity, extensive experience, and is a wise and distinguished senior statesman of Illinois. This man actually once was an opponent of mine for governor.
(LAUGHTER)
So I'm here today to announce that I am appointing Roland Burris as the next United States senator from the Illinois.
Roland Burris is no stranger to the people of our state. Between 1979 and 1992 he served the people of Illinois as the state's comptroller and the state's attorney general. He has had a long and distinguished career serving the people of Illinois. He will be a great United States senator.
And now I'd like to ask everyone to do one last thing. Please don't allow the allegations against me to taint this good and honest man.
Ladies and gentlemen, Roland Burris.
Still don't get how it's supposed to work? SNL has you covered.
[Image via Buzzfeed.]