More Fun With Blagojevich
These are tough times in America, but the corruption scandal that is Rod Blagojevich is the gift that keeps on giving.
Sitting across from C in a cafe today, she started laughing for no reason. I asked her what was so funny, and she said she was reading an article about the embattled governor's nomination of Obama's Senate replacement.
Sure sounds boring, right? Not if you read this as the Blagojevich would have spoken it in private,or as C read it to herself... with f-bombs galore! Try it yourself, it's lots of fun:
GOV. ROD BLAGOJEVICH (ILL.): The people of Illinois are entitled to have two United States senators represent them in Washington, D.C.
As governor, I am required to make this appointment. If I don't make this appointment, then the people of Illinois will be deprived of their appropriate voice and vote in the United States Senate.
Therefore, I am here to announce my intention to appoint an individual who has unquestioned integrity, extensive experience, and is a wise and distinguished senior statesman of Illinois. This man actually once was an opponent of mine for governor.
(LAUGHTER)
So I'm here today to announce that I am appointing Roland Burris as the next United States senator from the Illinois.
Roland Burris is no stranger to the people of our state. Between 1979 and 1992 he served the people of Illinois as the state's comptroller and the state's attorney general. He has had a long and distinguished career serving the people of Illinois. He will be a great United States senator.
And now I'd like to ask everyone to do one last thing. Please don't allow the allegations against me to taint this good and honest man.
Ladies and gentlemen, Roland Burris.
Still don't get how it's supposed to work? SNL has you covered.
[Image via Buzzfeed.]
Chicago Is The New Baltimore
Indicted Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich. Life, as predicted by art.
Clay Davis, fictional, corrupt state Senator. Clay, Rod. Rod, Clay. Sheeeeeeeit.
My very favorite thing about The Wire is that the series, taken as a whole, is a five season, 60 hour meditation on America's broken systems and corrupted ideals.
The series is cynical and brutally honest, but its creators -- among them Ed Burns, George Pelecanos and David Simon -- are correct. If they have a weakness, it is that they may be a touch too cynical, though even then, they are not off the mark by much.
By "correct" I don't mean just that I agree with them. I mean that The Wire's creators have put out a testable hypothesis, which has been proven true by subsequent events. The Wire is not guesswork or arguing or opinion. The Wire is tested, verified, repeatable fact. Their argument is not faith, not option, not fiction -- The Wire is Truth.
Rationale and Theory
Since WWII, key systems in America have been developed and driven by one fundamental belief, first put into action by IBM, Robert McNamara, and Ayn Rand: decisions should be based on reasoned and objective analysis of statistics.