Mad Men + X-Men = MadXMen
(click for full size)
Fantastic work by Writer: Geoffrey Golden / Artist: Jordan Monsell at Madatoms (via Digg).
Arnold Talks Some Smack
Schwarzenegger and DeVito. Such an unlikely pair that pretending they were Twins was the central joke for a whole movie. But both have mad comedy skills that have only grown over the years. DeVito shows off his genius every week in It's Only Sunny In Philadelphia. Arnold, despite being at constant political war with his legislature, also finds ways to have a little fun.
Earlier this year, he gave a metal sculpture of bull testicles to California’s Senate leader, but now, it seems as if he’s carrying his often-crass sense of humor over to his veto messages.Before we get into the latest mischief, some background: Earlier this month, the Republican governor crashed a San Francisco Democratic Party fund-raiser, where he was booed by Democrats still upset at the spending cuts he pushed this year. One attendee, Assemblyman Tom Ammiano, yelled “You lie!” at him, according to the San Francisco Chronicle. Then, Ammiano, a former standup comedian who is famous in San Francisco for his championing of liberal causes and gay rights, walked out on the speech, shouting a vulgarity.
Schwarzenegger has said he was unfazed by the incident.
Four days later, Assembly Bill 1176, which just happened to be sponsored by Ammiano, reached his desk. The bill would have expanded the financing powers of the Port of San Francisco. The state legislature didn’t have a problem with it; it cleared the Senate 40-0 and the Assembly 78-0.
Nonetheless, the former tough-talking “Terminator” star vetoed the bill, sending along a message [highlighted above].
Hilarious. Ammiano is generally well-intentioned, but Arnold won this round.
[Also see the SF Bay Guardian's coverage; image via wwtdd.]
Fresh Soccer Unis
Beware the small one in the front, their most feared assassin.
Shaolin shadowboxing, and the Wu-Tang sword style. If what you say is true, the Shaolin and the Wu-Tang could be dangerous.Do you think your Wu-Tang sword can defeat me? En garde, I'll let you try my Wu-Tang style...
- Wu-Tang Clan, Bring Da Ruckus, from "Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers)" (1993)
[via Kenny Bloggins]
Penguins Can’t Fly!?!
The Critic was Jon Lovitz at his best. Quotable, random, detailed, smart, layered, funny. While in college, I'd watch the back-to-back episodes of The Critic and The Tick every week, cracking up at the animated antics.
Unfortunately for me, I know almost no one else who watched these shows. I suppose the animation turned them off to experiencing comedic genius, which is really too bad. And, of course, I'd walk around using the genius one-liners and referencing jokes that no one else knew. I'm sure they thought I was crazy, but I don't really care -- it was funny for me.
One of the best jokes on the show involved Lovitz's character's adoptive father, an alcoholic millionaire who loved to get hammered and dress up as Baby New Year. (Hilarious already, no?) During a flight, the drunkard's plane started jumping around wildly so, fed up, he sprung to action. In a rule-breaking move that only the absurdly wealthy would think to attempt, Baby New Year burst into the cockpit, only to find a drunk penguin at the controls.
"A penguin. And you've been drinking! Wait a minute, penguins can't fly..."
So. Funny.
The Critic: Penguins Can't Fly
the penguin is probably the Dame Judy Dench of cartoon cameos. he’s in this episode for like 40 seconds total, and its probably the funniest thing i have ever seen. i’m sorry. i have a really weird sense of humor and an alcoholic penguin who cant fly a plane (where did he get those goggles? has he really bagged all those stewardesses? and most importantly, where did he get the idea to try to fly it from, the drinking?) is probably one of the funniest things in the entire world.
Ruining Reputations In The Northern Territory
Waitress Allyson White, 34
Amazing quotes in a story from the Northern Territory of Australia. We just don't get quotes like these here in the States. Also, the Humpty Doo is a great name for a town/tavern.
A WOMAN accused of performing a sexual act on a man when he crashed in Darwin's rural area is outraged at the allegation and says it is "absolutely wrong".
Allyson White said the standout burn mark left by her seatbelt across her chest was proof the claims of "amorous activities" with the driver were not true.
"I was not sucking his d*** - and it's pretty obvious that wasn't the case ... you only have to look at the mark on my chest," she said.
"Clearly I had my seatbelt on, so it's impossible that I'd be leaning over sucking his d*** unless he is hung like a donkey or I've got a f****** rubber neck.
"If it was true I'd just cop it sweet and think 'how embarrassing, I got caught sucking someone's d***' - but it is not true and that's what is p****** me off.
. . .
"I don't understand where that story has come from," she said.
"It may have looked bad when police first arrived as my girls were hanging out all over the place. I also had a $5 note wedged between my boobs so they probably just assumed I was a sex worker or something and he'd already paid me.
"But $5 is a bit cheap for a head job."
. . .
She said they stopped into the Humpty Doo Tavern where she usually works to invite other friends, including the unnamed driver, along to the bash.
He did not know how to get to the house so she jumped in his car to give him directions.
"We are just friends and it's pissing me off as people think I have done this behind my boyfriend's back - it makes me feel like a dirty bitch when I've done nothing wrong."
Declining a Windows 7 House Party Invitation
eBay user pkx tried (and -- shockingly! -- failed) to throw an install party. Having no further need of the Microsoft-provided house party kit, pkx put it up for sale on eBay. Luckily for us, pkx has witty friends and was kind enough to share the reasons given by his friends for declining the invitation to his, ahem, "party."
Unfortunately nobody showed up, so I'm selling this party pack. I've decided to post all of the evite responses:
Pete: I've got to work the drive-thru that night.
Reid: I'd love to come but I heard there is going to be Windows there.
Colin: Feeling too antisocial to come to a computer party 
AJ: FidoNet relay forgot to pay their modem line's phone bill, evite got delayed
Chris: Found out Windows 7 not available on 5.25" floppy.
Kevin: I'll be over as soon as I shut down my laptop. XP still has 72 updates to go.
Bryan: I was going to come to your party, but then I got high. I still have XP and I know why, yeah yeah, because I got high, because I got high, because I got high.
Andy: Didn't realize you needed to own a computer to use Windows 7.
Mike: I was going to come to your launch party but then a girl called.
Ira: Sorry, my guild has a raid.
Adam: Thunderbird on Ubuntu sent your evite into the spam folder because it said, "windows 7 party."
Amanda: I was going to come to your launch party but then a girl called.
Charles: Bing gave me the wrong directions.
Rich: MS-BOB not compatible with Windows 7. Not interested.
Mark: Needs more than 640k ram, which is more than I was told I would ever need.
Amanda rolling BIG for the win. Your favorite?
The Fruity Tree
The Fruity Tree